VOLUME 113 NUMBER 4
Cheshvan 28, 5785
November 29, 2024
Parshas Toldos
Candlelighting Time 4:18 

When Yaakov and Eisav reported back to their father Yitzchok after his request to have a meal before he extended his blessing it is interesting to note the differences between their language. Yaakov spoke in a more direct fashion to his father while Eisav spoke in third person. Perhaps one might think that Eisav’s manner of addressing his father was far more appropriate than the way in which Yaakov spoke to him. However, Chasam Sofer has a very interesting and different approach to their choice of vernacular.  

He comments that for all generations our manner of speech was always to speak directly to our elders. And the reason was that when conversing in a more casual form it is indicative of a degree of comfort and ease because a person feels an innate connection with the previous generational individuals and what they represent. Whereas when the conversation is more aloof that displays rather than a personal contact with the other person  instead just a informative discussion that is more based on retrieving facts than creating a special bond. And this is truly the distinction between our nation and the rest of the world. Our enduring relationship with our traditions and legacy inspires us to relate to those people that give us that treasured association. But when there is no credibility to correlate with rather only opinions of others who may be older but not necessarily wiser, then there is no prevailing attachment.   

Kli Yakar also presents the same point as the Chasam Sofer but adds two very noteworthy points. Firstly, Yaakov spoke with deep respect to his father stating that he should please sit down. There was an obvious concern for his father’s comfort and according him the proper deference that one should offer to a parent. Whereas Eisav did not address Yitzchok prefacing his remarks with the word please and additionally he ignored whether or not his father would be able to partake of his meal in a content and easy manner. These details clearly define a distinct line of demarcation between the attitudes of Yaakov and Eisav. Giving appropriate veneration to our elders and specifically one’s parents is an absolute marker of one’s character.  

  Even though our Sages state in many midrashim that the honor that Eisav accorded his father was outstanding and resulting in many advantageous gains for him, nonetheless we clearly see from the above exchange that it was not genuine. He would don royal garments while attending to his father but it was not sincere. When Yaakov encountered Eisav upon his return home from the house of Lavan, he said that he was afraid of him because of his fulfilling the mitzvah of honoring one’s parents. As great as the mitzvah that he achieved was which frightened Yaakov, still we know that it was extremely lacking in good faith. Indeed, one of the great Sages stated that no one every honored their parents as he did and Eisav honored his parents even more than him. On the one hand we marvel at the service of Eisav for his parents and he was rewarded in a commensurate fashion, but in the final analysis it was performed without the proper attitude and mentality. Therefore, we value rather the mitzvah performance of Yaakov over that of Eisav. 

A BYTE FOR SHABBOS

Both Yaakov and Eisav received the blessing that they should benefit from the ‘fat of the earth’ and the ‘dew of heaven.’ However, in Yaakov’s blessing the heaven precedes the earth and by Eisav it is the opposite. Each received the blessing according to their priority. Yaakov’s priority was his spirituality therefore the heavens are mentioned first while Eisav valued the material substance which nourishes the body but not the soul.                              

CHOFEZ CHAIM

GOOD SHABBOS

ALTHOUGH YAAKOV RECEIVED MANY MATERIAL BLESSINGS FROM HIS FATHER, THE MAIN BLESSING WAS THAT OF THE LEGACY OF AVROHOM, THE SPIRITUAL DOMAIN OF LIFE. WE LIVE IN VERY PRECARIOUS TIMES WHERE CONFUSION REIGNS AND IT IS SOMETIMES VERY DIFFICULT TO DISCERN WHAT IS TRUE AND WHAT IS A FALSEHOOD. THE ONLY ABSOLUTE TRUTH IS WHAT THE TORAH DICTATES THAT WE SHOULD OBSERVE WITH PASSION AND VERVE.